10 Things that can Really Upset You

1) finding out you're not getting that christmas present you wiated for all year.
2)having your guitar lessons taken away for a stupid excuse that has been overused till death.
3)making a point to go to comics connection, only to find the manga you want isn't out yet.
4)thinking you have found joy in the world, only to have your hopes completely and utterly crushed into microscopic pieces.
5)you trying your best to be patient and appear happy even when you're not, and having insensitive people make all your effort go to waste by their insults.
6)feeling inferior to just about eveyr othe rhuman being on earth.
7)watching something you want so badly dangle before your eyes, then get snatched away from you.
8)putting in effort and time into doing something only to find it doesn't meet up to your standards, and that you still fail at it anyway.
9)realising that everything you ever dreamed of in life seems so far away from where you're standing.
10)taking all the feelings and changes with stoic acception and a muttered "whatever."

10 Things that can make you Find Some Hope
1)talking to a friend who knows you so well that conversations are deep and thought-provoking.
2)staring at kakashi sensei under a tree in your glossy poster, wishing inherently that he would come to life and give you a good talk through.
3)watching the thing you've been wanting for ages materialise before your eyes.
4)the prospect of having an awesome new church to worhsip God.
5)knowing you haven't totally frozen over because you grimace when cut by a razor blade.
6)reading a good poem or hearing a song that reaches deep into your soul and writes out your feelings.
7)tasting the harsh and cool flavour of nicolet minst as you roll them about your tongue in thought.
8)contemplating deep things and questioning the world within yourself while listening to Rain from Magnacarta.
9)dreaming of things you hope so wildly to one day achieve.
10)smiling sadly and deciding you are finally going mad.

i am feeling cold.
both in body and in soul.
i am feeling dead.
the pain eats like maggots through my head.
i took down my old picture from the wall.
a new one i put so i wouldn't feel sore.
in the end it made no difference to me.
what i knew is gone and i have what i see.
memories, all of them turned to dust.
and becuase they haunt me i cannot trust.
sometimes i scare myself to bed.
because of the thoughts which go through my head.
of blood and bleeding, of death and ice.
i wade through all the bitterness and lies.
i fall from my eerie de ja vu.
i see what i see and it isn't you.
what's happening to me, this blood from my eyes.
are they the tears i hid in disguise.
i am feeling lonely. i am feeling cold.
i am lost to darkness. nobody shall know.