One thousand years.

One would think it could go on forever and ever. It should have anyway, in my opinion. The end of a thousand years came too soon for me. I listened to the Elders speaking of my time, listened to them speak of my coming Death. A pity, they all said. I had such power, such resilience, such determination. All gone to waste, because I could not earn the place of an Elder. A pity, they brooded. The poor child shall have to fall-- just like all the other glittery stars which littered the vlevet black blood of the night sky. The Elders, they said it with such immense grief you would think it was even some part sincere.

I laughed.

The Elders were never sincere. They had watched the comings and goings of millions of stars, sat through tousands upon thousands of years, watching Death claim us all. Mother Moon could do nothing about it, for Father Sun forbid her icy touch upon our shimmering souls-- our star fire. I shivered at this. Mother Moon may have been exultantly cold, but she seemed to care more for her child stars than Father Sun did. It always perplexed me, this. But it was just a mere distraction as I sat in the court of the Elders and pretended not to hear as they read my name out in the list of the Dead. My star fire was shaking, shuddering as if blown by a powerful gale. There was no sadness in me, only anger. Pure white seething anger. I must have glowed a little too brightly, for the other stars shuffled a distance away from me.

Calcifer, they whispered, in the tinkly quiet voices us stars have. Calcifer, your time is here.

Descend well!

How ironic. I had always thought the art of descending rather pointless. There was no justification in accumulating your grace when a few moments later, you hit the hardness of hateful earth and end up Dead, like so many others before you. Sometimes I wish I hadn't been made a star, although the freedom and flight it grants you is thrilling and life is far longer than that of mere humans. But I look down at the humans on earth, watch them carry out activities I can only dream about. I see their hopes, aspirations, faith. I see their love-- the one concept us stars have never been able to grasp. Love-- what did it mean? It was such an enigma to us. I would never know, I thought bitterly. My thousand years had been exhausted.

The hollow part where my star fire had been was now a dull, throbbing ache-- the pain muted and grey. My star fire was slowly fading away, toppling like dominoes into a vague nothingness. Is this what it feels like, what it feels like to Die? My thoughts fragmented and shattered into millions of tiny pieces, floating in the vast emptiness of the sky.

I was falling.

I felt it, the pull towards the ground, the strong merciless magnetism which dragged me. I cried out, but no sound emerged. My light dwindled, flickered as I fell through time and space. Everything swam past me, fast and swift like darting shadows while i stood still-- or perhaps it was the other way round. I wanted to weep, but stars have no tears. We have no heart, no soul, no spirit, no emotion.

The realisation dawned upon me all of a sudden. Love. Love is of the spirit and soul, and we have neither. Empty, soulless, cold.

We are stars. That is our nature. When we die we are erased forever, not a trace left behind. No remnants, just a broken heart that never was.

I am a star. That is my nature.

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The wind blew across his face. What a cold night! The young wizard thought. He brushed back his deep blue-black hair and strode in the tall grass, watching the stars fall. What had his uncle told him, about falling stars? He couldn't remember--it wasn't the time to remember lessons. He just wanted to leave the world for a moment and rest.

The young wizard Howl smiled as he watched stars streaking across the sky, leaving luminous trails of glitter in their wake. His boots barely touched the soil as he ran, trying to catch the glittering star fire as they tumbled down from the heavens. He sprinted alongside one, racing to catch up with it. He lost his balance, and tripped unceremoniously. The star darted out of sight, and its glow dissipated into the dark night. Howl frowned. He was determined to catch at least one falling star.

He rose again, jaw clenched tightly and eyes set with fierce determination. He was a stubborn boy, Howl-- when he set his mind on something, everything else fell away for him to accomplish his goal. His eyes roamed the skies expertly, fixing on one star as it joined its brethren in their fall. His legs moved quickly and forcefully, propelling him forward. The wind ruffled Howl's hair and tugged at his jerkin, but he continued on as if it were nothing. He fell in step with the falling star, taunting it and daring it to go faster.

Howl pushed, pushed and sped and tested his limits. He darted forward, reaching out both hands expectantly-- just a bit more, a little bit more....

He skidded onto the ground, hand clenched tightly around a faintly glowing light. He was lying on his stomach, scraped and bruised, but his hands were unyielding. Howl got up slowly, shaking his hair into place. He risked a slight opening in between his fingers and glimpsed the faintly glowing blue-green light within. It entranced him, and he opened his hands further and stared at the spherical orb nestled there. It was pulsing slowly and faintly, like a dying heartbeat. Bluish light glowed softly, and purplish-emerald sparks were gilded in the middle. Howl had never seen something so amazing before, and his young and curious mind refused to let it go.

Wizard.. the star said, its voice slow and halting. I am Dying wizard. Let me go.

Howl did not move for a moment. He wasn't surprised that the star had spoken to him, but he had no idea that stars could Die. He felt its pain, its unwillingness to Die as well as the knowing it had to. It felt as if he had found the only other soul similar to his-- the same confidence, the same fury, the same zest to live. He wanted to save it. He needed to.

You cant, the star replied to his thoughts. The price is too great for you.

Howl put on a defiant face and whispered fiercely, "I want to!"

The star seemed to heave something like a sigh. Wizard, I need your heart.

Howl shut his eyes and inhaled deeply. No turning back, this was the final threshhold.

He poured the star's glimmering light in through his mouth and willed it to go deep into his chest, to where his heart was beating in excited thumps. Those thumps began to slow, then fade and finally disappear enitrely. He felt heat rising in his chest, and he craned his neck forward, expelling out a bluish substance that seemed semi-liquid. Two eyes made of green flame and a mouth of red fire appeared, grinning at him.

Howl didn't know what to feel. In fact, it was hard to feel very much anymore. He felt like a part of him had suddenly been torn away-- but that was the price he had been willing to pay. Why? He questioned himself. Why had he done something so foolish?

Howl had no answer.

The young wizard felt as distant as a falling star.

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i wrote this. why?because i wanted to.